


All We Have

by delicatelyglitterywriter



Series: PeterDaisy Sibling AU [5]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Family Feels, Gen, Grab your tissues, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, many tears, very little happiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 02:57:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14844318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delicatelyglitterywriter/pseuds/delicatelyglitterywriter
Summary: He's been doing better these past two months. However, there are still days when he misses them. She misses them, too.





	1. MIT, Michelle, Ms May

**Author's Note:**

> This is Ira's fault. 
> 
>  
> 
> Also this is a standalone and does not affect any other stories in this series. It's an AU of the AU, if you will.

Peter’s had a good day, all in all. He finally worked up the courage to ask Michelle on a date and she accepted, and both he and Ned got accepted into MIT. He knows he should be the happiest kid in the world right now. 

But he’s not. 

Yes, all the stuff that happened today was good and made him feel happy, but it’s just not the same without Daisy and Aunt May. They’d both died six and a half months ago in a head-on collision with a drunk driver and had been declared DOA. 

He’s been getting better over the past two or so months, but he still thinks about them a lot. More often than not, he smiles when he thinks of them. But then when something big like this happens, he feels sad, wishing they were here to celebrate with him.

He doesn’t really acknowledge Ms May when she greets him softly with a smile. He can’t quite bring himself to. He grabs his after school energy bar and sits down at the table with every intention to do his homework. But as soon as he sits down, he feels as if all the energy has been sucked out of him and he has no desire to do homework or any other work. He lets out a long breath as Miss May sits down next to him.

“Was your day okay?”

She has an annoying knack for picking up when others aren’t okay. At least she always gives a choice as to whether or not open up about why he’s not okay. He appreciates it. He decides he will tell her about his day, and he tries to sound happy about it, but he can’t quite muster up the enthusiasm to really sell it.

“Yeah. I, uh, I got accepted into MIT today.”

He turns his head to look at her. He’s not really sure why. In the past, he’s never really expected a reaction from her. Perhaps now that his aunt and sister are dead, he’s been able to get closer to her and see that she’s not as cold as she makes herself appear to be. Perhaps now that he’s closer to her, he kind of wants her approval. 

It is, after all, the only familial approval he has left. 

“That’s great,” she says solemnly. “I’m really proud of you.”

The comment makes Peter’s heart swell a little, but it’s not enough for it to fill the May and Daisy shaped voids. He drops his head again.

“Yeah,” he sighs, feeling the ache in his chest. Maybe it’s time to follow the counsellor’s advice and stop trying to replace May and Daisy with Ms May. Maybe it’s time to let their own relationship form and blossom as Peter and Ms May. His head snaps up at the sound of her voice.

“Hey, Pete,” she says softly, massaging his shoulder. “May and Daisy would be really proud of you.”

“Really?” Peter isn’t sure what he had been expecting, but it wasn’t that. A ghost of a smile tugs at his lips before floating away again.

“Really.” May nods definitively. “Do you want to go to the cemetery and tell them, together?”

Peter’s mood picks up, just a little bit, and he nods, yes. “I’d like that.”

A little while later, he’s standing at May and Daisy’s twin tombstones. His heart flutters in his chest. While it may not be them in person, it still feels like he’s seeing them again after a really long time. Even if they’re not really there, here he can at least pretend they are. He feels Ms May give him a little nudge and he moves forward without any further prompting, kneeling on the grass between their stones. 

“Hey, guys, you’re never gonna believe what happened today,” he says, as if casually telling them about his day over dinner. “I got accepted into MIT. My first choice. Ned got accepted, too, so we get to still go to school together! How cool is that? Ned and I are so excited and we’re celebrating this Saturday by going to that ice cream place on the outskirts of the city. It’s really far away, but on the car ride here, I convinced Ms May to drive us so we don’t have to take the bus. I hope she doesn’t mind our rowdiness.

“I also finally worked up the nerve to ask Michelle out on Friday night. She said yes, and you should have seen her smile! It was kinda like one of those shy, schoolgirl crush smiles, and it was so pretty and cute, and I didn’t know she was capable of smiling like that! She seemed too tomboyish to be able to smile like that, but I’m glad she can. It made my chest feel all warm and fuzzy and fluttery. It was a really nice feeling.

“I wish you guys didn’t die so you could react to it. May, you’d give me a whole lecture on being a gentleman, and being home by eleven, and maybe even using condoms if we were going to...well, you know, and I’d get all embarrassed, making Daisy laugh so loudly both you and Ms May would tell her off, and then she’d tease me mercilessly about it all, and then you’d all go on to talk about how proud you are I got into MIT and…”

Peter trails off, feeling tears burn in his eyes. “I...I really miss you guys. I wish you were really here.”

Peter lowers his head, clenching his fist. His letter of acceptance crumples beneath his fingers. But he doesn’t care. His chest aches so much and he wants nothing more than to bring them back, even for one more minute, just to have a chance to say a proper goodbye.

“I-I just want to hug you guys, just once more,” he begs, his voice barely a whisper. He squeezes his eyes shut, trying desperately to stop the tears from falling.

Peter draws in a short breath when he feels Ms May kneel down next to him. He feels her coax him into her arms. He doesn’t fight it, letting the first tears fall as he rests his head against her chest. He not only wishes May and Daisy were with them, he wishes he could have allowed himself to get closer to Ms May than he had. She’s the only family he has left, and he knows he has to make the most of it. He can’t keep fighting the emotional bond forming. He has to lean into it, as he’s leaning into Ms May now. 

He’s just scared to. Scared that if he gets close to Ms May, she’ll be taken away, too. But, then again, she will die too, someday, and wouldn’t it be better for him to have happy and meaningful years with her, than to have mediocre years with her and then regret it when she did inevitably die? 

He decides there and then as he cries, that he’s not going to try and fill his Daisy and May shaped holes in his heart with Ms May, but he’s instead going to make a new space especially for her. He needs her, and he knows she needs him. Now, more than ever. 

“I miss them so much,” he chokes out in between sobs. What he really means is that he’s sorry he hasn’t allowed himself to grow close to her, and somehow, he knows that she knows what he means. Ms May hushes him, giving him a squeeze and planting a kiss on the top of his head.

“Me too, Peter. Me too.”


	2. Peter, Pain, Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The same as the first, but from May's point of view

May’s washing dishes when the apartment door opens and Peter walks in. He’s been happier these two past months, which makes May happy. It’s been rough on them both since Daisy and Peter’s Aunt May died six and a half months ago. 

Peter lost a sister and his only remaining biological family, May lost her daughter and the love of her life. She doesn’t ever compare her and Peter’s suffering, knowing they each shared a special bond with the two women; they each deserve to be able to feel sadness over it. 

“Hey, Peter,” she greets softly with a smile as he grabs his snack and sits down at the table. She notices his shoulders are slumped today, and he’s not as responsive. He must be really missing them today. She stops what she’s doing and goes over to him, sitting down next to him.

“Was your day okay?”

“Yeah,” Peter says somewhat flatly. May knows he’s trying to sound enthusiastic, but is really hurting. “I, uh, I got accepted into MIT today.”

He looks at her, and the pain she sees in her eyes makes her feel as if she’s just been stabbed in the chest. He doesn’t deserve this. He shouldn’t have had his family snatched away from him so soon and so suddenly. May rests a hand on his shoulder and gently massages it. 

“That’s great. I’m really proud of you.”

“Yeah,” Peter sighs, looking down. 

May controls her urge to tense up and show her hurt over the simple, somewhat dismissive comment. She’s been trying to connect with him ever since Daisy and May’s deaths, since she’s the last family he’s got left. It’s worked partially, he’s been more open with her, and has started to learn she’s not as scary as she often makes herself out to be. She feels he’s finally beginning to trust her in a really deep and meaningful way. 

Yes, she hates that it took death to move their relationship along, but she’s still grateful that this is what has come out of it. 

Despite this, she knows that Peter still valued his aunt’s and Daisy’s approval over hers. She’s getting better at not being hurt by it, but sometimes it can sting a little. But she never, ever lets that show. He’s got enough guilt to deal with. He doesn’t need any more. 

So, she says what she knows he needs to hear. 

“Hey, Pete, May and Daisy would be really proud of you.”

It’s not just what she knows Peter needs to hear; it’s what she knows to be true, with all of her heart. 

Peter looks up. “Really?”

May nods solemnly. “Really. Do you want to go to the cemetery and tell them, together?”

Peter nods. “I’d like that.”

A half hour later, they’re at the cemetery, in front of Daisy and May’s graves, side-by-side. In his hand, Peter’s clutching his acceptance letter. He looks up at May, and she nudges him forward with an encouraging smile.

“Hey, guys, you’re never gonna believe what happened today,” he says, kneeling in the grass between their tombstones. “I got accepted into MIT. My first choice. Ned got accepted, too, so we get to still go to school together! How cool is that?”

May watches silently as Peter rambles on about his day to Daisy and May. She can hear how happy his voice is, talking to them as if they’re still alive. May blinks back tears, allowing herself to miss them as she watches Peter. She wishes she could have his level of passion and imagination, that he’s able to hold a  _ normal _ conversation with them. 

She looks over at May’s stone, letting some of her best memories with her wife flood her mind: the day she proposed, the wedding, the two of them having a flour fight while trying to bake a cake for a school thing Peter had, the soft wake up kisses, the walks through the park, the time they got arrested at the mall for causing public disturbance. She smiles, and swipes at her eyes. The years she spent with May were some of the best years of her life.

She looks over to Daisy’s stone. Daisy had been her entire world before Peter and May, and even when the Parkers had entered her life, Daisy had still remained her cornerstone; the one she would turn the world upside down for. 

She looks to Peter. Sweet, gentle, and kind Peter. In many ways, he reminds her of both May and Daisy. He has May’s concern for the wellbeing of others over himself. He has her laugh, and her walk. He has her eating habits, too. He has Daisy’s stubbornness. Her ability to stand up and say ‘no’. Her undying devotion to whatever cause she had deemed worthy of her time. 

In many ways, May realises, Peter is a combination of the two people she loved most in the world. The thought brings fresh tears to her eyes, both of sadness over losing them, and gladness that she’ll be able to see them in Peter every single day.

She continues to watch Peter as his talking slows and his breaths become short and shaky. 

“I...I really miss you guys,” he says softly, though May can hear it from where she’s standing. “I wish you were really here. I-I just want to hug you just once more.”

Peter stops talking and May moves forward, lowering herself to the ground next to him. His head is bowed, his letter clenched so tight it’s crumpled, and his knuckles white. Without a word, May coaxes him into a hug. She can’t give the hug he wants from his aunt or sister, but she can at least give  _ a _ hug.

She just hopes it’s enough.

As soon as Peter’s head touches her chest, he begins to cry. May holds him tight, letting him cry. She cries too, only not as loudly as he. 

“I miss them so much,” he chokes out between sobs. May hushes him, planting a kiss on the top of his head.

“Me too, Peter. Me too.”


End file.
